so. i think there’s a good chance this was a joke. i lost my mind laughing when i first got it. but also? this is exactly how men talk, so i’m gonna break it down seriously.
i made that post after dinner with my friend’s family. his dad, let’s call him john, was belittling his wife so she wasn’t talking much and he’d made a few jabs about his son’s painted nails so his son was kind of wilting. john’s a nice guy, smart guy, really likes me & thinks i’m smart. i was pretty much carrying all the emotional labor at that dinner–trying to make my friend and his mom feel comfortable while also engaging with john. we were making conversation about lots of things, it wasn’t a particularly controversial or heated discussion at really any point in time. again, john’s a cool guy–he’s liberal and progressive and knows that i’m a lesbian and all sorts of nice things. he works for a bigggg banking company–i don’t wanna say which one, but you’d know the name. we were talking about #metoo and he starts talking about how sexual harassment isn’t really an issue where he works.
three hours before he said this, a man in times square had grabbed my boob. at a restaurant i worked at, a rapist who worked there got my number off the scheduling app and would text me vile things while we were both working to make me uncomfortable. he’d also touch my ass every shift but always managed to pretend like it was an accident. it wasn’t. my best friend, who was also at dinner with us, worked at her moms law firm when she was 17, and the man across from her had a countdown on his whiteboard to the day she turned 18 and every day he would look at her as he changed the number. i’ve been sexually assaulted multiple times outside of these instances, and so has she.
but other men don’t see these things.
and this man looks at me, and tells me sexual harassment doesn’t happen, because he doesn’t see it. and here’s the thing: that’s not why i’m mad. i’m not mad because he didn’t know.
i’m mad because i know this man. he is my friend’s father, he is my father, he is my uncles, he is my professors, he is my cousins, and my bosses, and my colleagues. i know how you have to talk to these men. it’s a game. and you have to play along whether you want to or not, because they won’t hear a word you say if you don’t.
here’s how the game works: john talks about everything like he’s the authority on the matter, because he can’t get it through his brain that someone, especially someone who is not a man, could possibly know something he doesn’t. so john starts talking about things very confidently. and because nobody knows everything, he gets a lot of things wrong. things that i refuse to let him be wrong about. so if i want to change john’s mind, if i want him to hear my point of view, i have to speak to him in the only way he will listen. i have to be, above all, pleasant. john has been taught for years to laugh at a woman’s anger, so if any hint of indignation sneaks into my voice, he won’t take me seriously any more and i’ll lose him entirely. i have to smile and laugh a little and be charming. but i also have to be articulate. i have to make sure i sound intelligent or else he’ll dismiss me as a stupid teenage girl who doesn’t know what she’s talking about. but i also can’t sound too intelligent because if he starts feeling threatened by my intelligence he’ll get defensive. (sidenote! he has a tiny dick.) so it’s quite a complicated game but i’m good at it. in fact, i’m one of the best. so here i am, carefully navigating the best way to hold this man’s hand and babysit him as i give him a kindergarten level course on sexual assault in the workplace, while also not letting him realize that i’m having to condescend to him because his brain is as tiny as his dick, and can only handful little bits of new information spoonfed to him like applesauce. i have to make it sound like i think he is not only smart, but smarter than me. i have to scatter in little phrases like, “in my experience” or “i could be wrong” and constantly undermine myself, even when speaking on a topic i am incredibly well-versed in, because i have to suggest that i think he is smarter than me or else he won’t deem me worthy of his attention.
i’m good at it. i play the little fucking game and before i know it, i’ve got john here nodding along and acting like he agreed with what i’m saying all along, acting like he came up with it, acting like he DIDN’T totally contradict what i just told him minutes before. but since he didn’t come up with it, he’ll likely interrupt me before i even get to the end of my point and say something totally misinformed and now i’m trying to educate him on both of the things he got wrong but before i can even do that he’s interrupting me again and now there’s THREE things i’ve gotta teach this guy without him catching on to the fact that i’m teaching him.
now. here’s the best part about the game. it’s soul-shatteringly dehumanizing. to disregard your own trauma, your own emotion, your own incredibly valid anger that you have fought and fought and fought to believe you have a right to feel, to tone down your beliefs in order to make them more palatable to someone who is this deeply ignorant, to force yourself to giggle and be charming as you discuss the thing that has ripped you into shreds, to ignore how triggering it is to even breach this topic in conversation, to be complicit in making yourself small in order to get your point across, to look into the eyes of a man who has, unwittingly, because of his ignorance, enabled other men to engage in this same behavior–it turns a dinner conversation into a thing that is traumatizing in it’s own right.
and i feel obligated to put myself through this because of my privilege, because as an attractive, white twenty year old, i can hold this man’s attention better than a massive portion of the population, who he likely wouldn’t give the time of day to. i refuse to let him live his life unchallenged, so i do what i have to do to make myself heard.
and i feel the repercussions of this so strongly i dissociate more viciously than i have in weeks and lose all memory of a solid 3 hours of my life after this conversation.
and i come on here, and post: men are useless and exhausting. because i am angry at what men have done to me. at what they continue to do to me. at what i must do to myself in order to force them to wake up and realize what other men are doing to me and to please, for the love of god, MAKE IT STOP.
and i get this message from you, a dumbass who’s got his head shoved so far up his own asshole that it’s about to come back up through his esophagus, assuming you know what i’m talking about. assuming you know more than me about men and about my experiences with them, about why i made this post. assuming that because you’re not the scum of the fucking earth and because you do three good things, it somehow balances out the treatment i have received for years from men, and makes my anger towards them, and my hatred of them: unjust. and my post wasn’t even me being angry! it was me being exhausted!!!!! if i’m tired of men, why the fuck would you, “a male” deem it at all appropriate to come near me, to send me a message, to engage with me at all? leave me alone! you know nothing!
and as much as i thought this was a joke at first, the more i read the message the more i’m convinced that it was written by a man, because even a girl pretending to be a man as a joke wouldn’t manage to sound this fucking stupid. i have dozens of stories exactly like this over the course of at least 10 years of my life. i know more than you. and this isn’t FUCKING about you. if you weren’t useless and exhausting, you would have happily scrolled by and went on with your night. but by sending me this message you proved yourself to be IMPRESSIVELY: useless and exhausting. shut the fuck up for about 3-4 years. you might learn something. also, read men explain things to me by rebecca solnit. she says all this better than i do.
My mother suffers from migraines that are often triggered by scent. This can range anywhere from cleaning products, scented garbage bags, cologne/perfume and so on. As such, she’s had to ask for accommodations in the facility she works. This has included wearing surgical masks, industrial respirators, and having a perfume/cologne free work environment.
Here’s the thing, since receiving the accommodations, my mother has gone to the hospital more than six times for perfume exposure. Why? Because her co-workers deliberately wear excess amounts of perfume or cologne to trigger her migraines because they believe their right to wear perfume outweighs her right to live. This is not an exaggeration, my mother’s doctors have repeatedly stated that any one of these incidents could actually kill her.
Oh, and let me be clear, these are deliberate incidents. These are documented grievances with witnesses. Witnesses who saw co-workers put on perfume before interacting with my mother or workers deliberately crossing in my mother’s work area despite not even working in the area. Workers who have admitted to exposing her on purpose. Even worse, some of those who’ve exposed her are supervisors.
People don’t believe my mother when she says her migraines are triggered by scent. Because they can’t see it, they don’t think it can possibly be that bad. It has taken her literally being hauled off in ambulance for some people to understand the severity of her condition.
Illnesses or disabilities, whether visible or not, are not jokes. Don’t play with someone else’s health or well being. It’s fucked up.
So Scientology has recently been purchasing ad spots on social media sites including Twitter and Facebook. Scientology has always worked hard to recruit young people it seems like they’re investing in social media as well now. I know most people think Scientology is a joke but it’s a seriously dangerous cult which uses fear, extortion, violence, vandalism and various other unethical actions against those who oppose them both inside and outside the church. Here is key information on the abuses committed by Scientology:
•Scientology uses a form of pseudo-therapy called auditing which focuses largely on embarrassing and traumatic memories. Scientology collects the information you share and uses that information to threaten you if you oppose the church. They also charge huge amounts of money for auditing sessions (which is why they really are doing all this).
•They are extremely anti-psychology and psychiatry and pressure you against taking any antidepressants, anti-anxiety medication or any other drugs for mental health.
•They believe homosexuality can be “cured” and are blatantly homophobic. •Enemies of the church are labeled “suppressive persons” and it is forbidden to communicate with such people. This isn’t just to limit the negative press they receive but also is a manipulative tool. If you are in the cult and decide to leave or criticize the church you stand the risk of being completely cut off from your friends and family. “Suppressive Persons” are often also harassed, stalked, or threatened.
•If you’re new to Scientology and your family or friends are worried about you being in a cult you’re instructed to cut them out of your life, increasing your reliance on the support system (though there’s nothing supportive about it) the church give to you.
•Scientology’s doctrine includes the concept of “Fair Game”. This basically says that those who are judged a threat to the Church can be punished and harassed by any and all means possible.
•Because of this, they have no moral qualms about having their members lie in court which they use to defend themselves from lawsuits or charges that they’ve broken the law and also to help win lawsuits against their enemies. •They essentially spied on and stole information from the IRS and tried to frame the mayor of Clearwater Florida for a hit and run.
•Scientology filed 50 different lawsuits in one year against the Cult Awareness Network, an anti-cult organization. Using false testimony they won one of the suits and because the organization couldn’t pay the fine Scientology took the organizations name and logo so if you were calling to get out of Scientology you’d be unknowingly telling Scientology of your intentions. (For full transparency my mom was a member of the Cult Awareness Network before it was taken over and was sued individually by the Church of Scientology)
•Scientology has an official branch known as the Sea Org, a mixture between a paramilitary group and slavery, comprised of their most dedicated members including many children/teens who’ve been raised in Scientology. This is where some of the most rampant and terrifying abuse in Scientology occurs.
•Sea Org members often work over 100 hours a week for Scientology for around 2$ per hour.
•Sea Org member’s living conditions are terrible; they live in overcrowded communal rooms with up to 12 other people, are not given healthcare unless there is a free clinic in the area, often are forced to miss meals or sleep in order to successfully completed their work.
•Several former Sea Org members have accused the church of physical abuse. •Sea Org members may not have children and women who have become pregnant have reportedly been forced/coerced by their higher-ups to have abortions.
•Leaving Sea Org without permission automatically makes you a suppressive person, so young adults who’ve been raised in Scientology who want to leave are cut off from everyone they’ve ever known with no money or job and getting permission to leave can require 3 years of hard labor, social isolation, and group pressure.
it’s one of the scariest “religions” you’ll ever meet if not THE scariest because it was PURPOSELY created to make money. unlike most cults that do have some seed of genuine belief however twisted and off base the founders are, scientology was never a belief system – it was a get rich quick scheme for a terrible hack author who saw that there was more money to be made in manipulating people into a cult and then not letting them leave. higher and higher levels of scientology, which you have to take to be truly “clear” aka free of evil spirits, will cost you thousands and even millions of dollars. they will literally hook you into a billion year contract and then pursue you for any money you “owe” them, thousands of “back fees” for their religious training, if you try to leave.
stay the fuck away from anything marked scientology or dianetics. narconon (NOT the same as narcotics anonymous, the 12 step program) is also their thing. never even step FOOT into one of their free dianetics “auditing sessions” because they will use it to manipulate you into joining. they are incredibly persistent and will use every trick in the book to get you on board.
scientology: not even once.
Off the top of my head, a non-exhaustive list of “Brand Names” used by Scientology:
Narconon
Dianetics
Associate of Better Living and Education (ABLE)
Criminon
Applied Scholastics
Delphi Schools
The Way to Happiness Foundation
Author Service Inc.
Bridge Publications Inc.
Golden Era Productions
New Era Publications
Citizens Commission on Human Rights
The National Commission on Law Enforcement and Social Justice
Do not join any of the organizations. Do not work with them. Do not use their materials. Do not give them your money. Do not sign any documents.
^^^^
I can add nothing to this post except to say that this is true. I’ve crossed paths with these people several times. It’s a fascinating and terrible psychological control.
Took notes on Scientology from a public speaker and regrettably this is very true, based on the research done afterwards. But I think the obvious tell is the fact that the speaker began by explaining for 20 minutes straight about how “Scientology is not evil. It’s not a cult. People are just wrong and stupid.” Anyway if you have to preface your speech with a multitude of reasons why people shouldn’t think your belief system is god awful, then you may have a problem.
I fucking heard a commerical for them on a fairly popular radio station and am absolute appalled
I’ve heard them, too, and they’ve set up their own TV channel as well.
Particular PSA for the Tumblr crowd as I know there’s a lot of creators on here: They’re also behind the “Writers of the Future” and “Illustrators of the Future” contests, which are run by “Author Services Inc” and “Galaxy Press” so beware of those if you’re looking to submit anything to contests
Gonna add a lil’ something. In my town, they have their “church” set up right near a college campus and right near the main strip of places to eat, get coffee, etc. It’s a very non-descript building and they have a sidewalk chalkboard that says “free personality test.” Then you look up and see “Church of Scientology” on the building high above the sign. If you never look up and you’re interested in stuff like Myers-Briggs and stuff, I can see someone getting sucked in very easily.
I listened to this so many times in a row that the original arrangement is forever ruined for me. Oh you wanted to be spooky? Too bad, now I’m thinking about all the characters in a smoky underground speakeasy and your score is ruined.
Christ almighty, I haven’t laughed this hard in awhile.
Neural networks are computer programs that learn by example. Rather than a programmer teaching them step-by-step rules on how to solve a problem, neural networks try to deduce their own rules by looking at examples of lots of successful solutions.
One of the first problems I tried to solve with neural networks, inspired by this post, was generating new cookbook recipes by letting a neural network look at about 30,000 existing recipes. This, as it turns out, is not a great way to get a coherent recipe. With a memory only a few words long, and without any concept that the letters it was choosing corresponded to ingredients and things that were happening to them, the neural net’s recipes were usually inadvisable and frequently impossible.
As it so happens, I was testing out some features of textgenrnn and turned to recipes as a test dataset. As a result, I have some new “gems” to share with you.
Framework: textgenrnn, longtext mode Memory: 40 characters (default) Training length: ~15 hours on an Nvidia K80 (via Google Cloud) Sampling temperature: 0.6
First, allow me to present some of my favorite individual ingredients:
½ teaspoon ground beer ½ cup crushed sherry 1 lavy milk ½ cup fresh minced or worky sugar ½ teaspoon dried margarine 1 ½ teaspoon minced powder 1 single sugar 1 long granulated sugar 1 green cubes 1 spanish water 2 lb beer stock 1 cup cream cheese seed
And now, the recipes:
Christed Whites Continue Sauce
main dish, discorti, crabmets
Note:: Mix to recipe of sweetened sugar. Add the blueberries a squart until thickens of to a 4" Nut in Marrgarine using; ½ ** esed nam, stew
1 small garlic; chopp 2 eggs 1 cup sugar ¾ cup sugar ½ lb pork * ½ cup black peppers 2 eggs 2 tablespoon sauas slest ½ teaspoon salt ¾ teaspoon marshmall ½ cup chives sauce 1 teaspoon numguinitiso paste ½ teaspoon dry say beef salt 1 medium onion; diced ½ cup coriander or water, sour crushed. In a sea vanil soda, if desired.
Add tomatoes and they browned as the in a sauce. Add spankly mixture about 1 ½ to 6 minutes, or water, unough a ½ is is need, please the mart boiling. Garnish with a sink forilith mushrooms. Whick until sugar and mixture at low bowl. Add the beans. Stir in over mixer.
Add carrot is a salt and taste. Working, nutmeg. Makes 4.
Yield: 6 servings
I guess dividing the 4 sauces into 6 servings is left as an exercise to the reader.
Combine sugar and sugar and sprinkle with the sugar. Place a desired pan, and let stand 1 minute. Add the salt and pepper. Add beef and turkey and sides of cake of butter. Bring to a boil, bake at 350 degrees F. Retep the bottom of pan in a large rack.
Combine the chocolate cheese and the cheese and serve with quarters. Remove from pan and add to strainers and simmer until the sauce forms the clear some eggs and so the finger large soup comes out cleandrated with masil cooking lengthwise and the well some of the beef and the steamed sauce. It is the measure of board with a sloth bone. Serve warm. Sprinkle with dry salt, then add the shallots and salt and pepper. Sprinkle with salt, and pepper. Stir until potatoes are softened. Remove from heat; cover and simmer 2 minutes. Whisk in the milk and butter. Add to bisquins. Stir to make uncooked and serve, up to 2 cups. Pour into 1 cup soup. Add 1 tbsp. cabbage
Source: by Meal-Margarine Crab
The cabbage makes it healthy.
Artich Soup Salad
cakes, cheese/eggs, cassamaes
2 medium onion 1 tablespoon red minced garlic ½ teaspoon salt ½ cup orange milk, baking sheet 1 shredded, chopped ½ teaspoon salt ½ teaspoon pepper 1 teaspoon crushed milk ½ teaspoon salt ½ teaspoon salt ½ teaspoon salt ½ teaspoon salt 1 teaspoon pepper ½ teaspoon crushed miniature 1 cup chives or canned milk 1 cut into ½-inch can stock 1 single sugar ½ cup chlithed (or cold white wine wine 1 chives.
Fry Puely and oil over medium-read slices on the dish. Add the microwave beef and cook and cook.
From: Baste Fritized Baked Cheddar Let Cookbook
Yield: 6 servings
I’ve got several more blog posts about recipes (using char-rnn rather than textgenrnn). If you want to read more from textgenrnn (which does seem to make different mistakes from char-rnn), and/or get bonus material every time I post, enter your email here.
Hey Tumblr mom, I know your asks are closed but this popped up on my Facebook feed and I’m worried. Is this safe?? @thebibliosphere
Tea tree is a good treatment for lice, provided it’s diluted properly (shampoo counts) but the spray bottle is making me uncomfortable. It’s not something I’d like to get near eyes, and not everyone reacts well to it respiratory wise, especially not little ones or pets.
As an aside, a more effective method of using tea tree oil to treat head lice is to make a solution of olive oil (One cup olive oil to 5-10 drops of tea tree) and comb it through the hair, leaving it on for several hours (usually over night) and then washing it out and going through your hair with a lice comb, sometimes known as a “bone comb”.
The reason this works is because the olive oil smothers the adult lice, and the tea tree oil sort of napalms the heck out of the eggs, making them easier to comb out with a lice comb, thus shortening their life span and reducing treatment time.
Also, if you’re using it as a spray to keep away mosquitoes, spray your clothes, not your skin.
Also, correct me if I’m wrong, but I believe you’ve also said in other essential oil posts that while tea tree oil solutions will also do the same to fleas and flea eggs, it will make your animals quite sick. Something for those interested in parasite control to keep in mind.
Oh shit yea, should have said. Don’t use it on your pets or anything your pets use. Tea tree oil is toxic to cats and dogs and can induce painful burns, seizures and death.
“Not all men” you’re right. Sir Samuel Vimes, Duke of Ankh-Morpork, Commander of the City Watch would never do this, and he’d arrest every single bastard who would.
Frankenuff’s Castle 